SEVEN SHELBYS: A Tribute to True Heroes on Veteran's Day

 

 I dedicate this post to my friend Larry Frost....

After reading, please do the following:   respond with any thoughts you have on this particular reflection, or please feel free to share any reflections YOU have from a visit somewhere that made you stop and think and remember about the sacrifices of our American veterans, a story of a beloved veteran in your family, perhaps, or a friend...whatever you would like to share with us. Finally, watch and offer your response to this video by clicking this LINK

One weekend, several years ago, my husband and I took the family over to our Estrella Residential Center to visit the Moving Vietnam Memorial Wall. At that time, I had not yet seen the one in Washington DC, neither had our kids, so we thought that would be a nice way to spend a Sunday afternoon and reflect on the freedom we enjoy, and take time to honor those who have made the ultimate sacrifice.

One of our very dearest friends is a Vietnam veteran.  He has shared many incredible stories with us in our home and his.  We have looked through his picture and scrap books of memories, and seen the display of his many war medals that his wife lovingly made for him.  He had tried to throw them all away once, but she would not hear of it.  Despite the memories that still haunt him over thirty years later, she sees him as a true American hero.  So do I. 

I remembered him telling us many times about his dear friend, Shelby, whom he lost over in Vietnam.  It was a horrifying story in which my friend witnessed his best friend's helicopter being shot down just yards away from his own.  Shelby had a baby daughter when he died...a daughter who would never know the incredible, kind-hearted man who was her father.

We arrived to the wall that day, and I realized I didn't have the slightest clue as to what Shelby's last name was so that I could find him on the wall.  My friends live in Kauai, so I texted them, hoping that perhaps they would see the text and reply in time.  In the meantime, we decided to try and inquire based on our knowledge of Shelby's first name.  It was not a common first name.  Maybe, just maybe, we would get lucky.

We asked the volunteers who were not only gracious, but eager to help us find this friend.  They looked up the name "Shelby" in the database.  "Let's give it a try," one of them said.  Then, we waited a few short seconds, and she gave us the verdict:  "Seven.  There are seven Shelby's on the Vietnam Wall."

I asked her about them--perhaps some detail might register so that we could narrow it down.  Here is what I learned:

There are seven Shelbys on the Vietnam Memorial Wall.

One was from Louisianna.  

Two were from West Virginia.

One was from Virginia.

One was from Missouri

One was from Nebraska

and one Shelby hailed from Ohio.

All of the Shelbys on the wall were from the ages of 20-23 when they died.

Seven sons.  Seven friends to countless others.  Seven American heroes.

These are the things these soldiers share...along with their name.

Suddenly, we wanted to find them. We all wanted to find each of the Shelbys on the wall because no matter which one was my friend's buddy, they all had a story to tell. 

A story that ended much, much too soon.

In a strange way, I felt we owed all of the Shelbys a glance, a silent word of thanks.  A touch on the wall.  A photograph.

They deserved to be remembered.

We found all of the Shelbys.  I took photographs of their names because these young men matter.  

My friend did send me a text before we left the exhibit, and we were able to obtain a rubbing of his Shelby.  The Shelby who was his dearest friend.  The Shelby who would never really know his daughter.  The Shelby who will always have a place in my friend's heart, and now, mine...

But I am so grateful to have found the others, as well.  They will also have a place in my heart.

WORDS ARE LIFE

 

"Don't get upset by what he said.  They're only words." 

 Does this statement, or any close variation of it sound familiar to you?  How many of you embrace it as your own philosophy?  How many of you would like to give the speaker a nice, firm sock in the arm?  Well, I am going to start this post here by making a bold statement.  Here it goes: Whether you acknowledge it to be true or not, your words have power.  Lots of it.  You may not feel very powerful when you utter them, but they are, as the great English proverb tells us, "Mightier than the sword."

Now, allow me to explain and expand.  For some, the words of others don't sting as much as they will for others, but whether you are tough as nails or a marshmallow when it comes to matters of the heart, those to whom you communicate may not fall into your same category.

For this reason, being a thoughtful, empathetic, yet clear communicator is a precious skill--especially for those of you who plan to be in any form of upper management.  The best leaders in any industry got there because they knew how to communicate.  They were aware of the great power of their words, and they used that power with skill and wisdom.

If not everyone receives the same words in the same spirit, then how do we become astute at the great art of communication?  Well, the answer is in the question:  it is an art, so we practice.  We test the waters.  Observe more than just verbal communication/language.  We communicate who we are to others in many different ways and within many unique nuances.  Reading people --really taking the time and presence of mind to actively listen to not just what they say but how they say it--can really tell you a lot.

In year one and year two of the IB Language and Literature, Diploma Program, we have already done a lot of communicating with one another in various groups and partnerships, as well as all together on our blog.  As Markus Zusak wrote in his masterpiece, The Book Thief, "words are life," figuratively and quite literally.  Combinations of letters create words, the arrangement of words create sentences, these sentences convey meaning.  What the recipient does with that meaning--how they deconstruct it--builds and tears down elements of their very character.  That's power!

This year, you will continue to have many opportunities to observe and learn from each other's communication styles, and practice wielding your language "sword."  The spoken and written word both have their moment on the world's stage, and whether their influence is felt on a small or large scale, it is a moment that carries power for the listener: a moment in the ears can lead to a lifetime on the heart.  In his novel The Name of the Wind, Patrick Rothfus writes: "Words can light fires in the minds of men; words can wring tears from the hardest hearts."  See?  I'm not the only literary person to make those bold statements.

In the link below, you will have the opportunity to read Cat Thompson's article, The Power of Language.  Read through it, maybe even commit some of it to memory as a resource to use when you communicate.  See what happens!

You are powerful.  Whether written or spoken, your words carry the power to build someone up and bring life, or tear them down and bring death.

Just like that mighty sword the English were talking about.

Directions for your response post:
1.  Read the short article by clicking the link HERE.  Then, reflect on what you learned, and what most resonates with you on the topic.  
2.  Go through the quotes below about words and their power.  Pick a favorite, type it up in your post, and write about why it was your favorite.  I would LOVE to hear your thoughts...in your own words.

Quotes about language/words: 
The idea that language has great power is nothing new!  But words by themselves only have as much power as we allow them.  Even though our modern society is much more sensitized and defensive in nature (we seem to have lost the art to debate and replaced it with the great art of mudslinging in the public arena), in ancient times and during the Renaissance, the power of our language was acknowledged, admired, and celebrated.  Here are a few famous quotes, including those collected from Proverbs in the Bible and the great bard, Shakespeare, himself...